A crush is basically the Survivor of romance. It is what separates the strong from the weak; the girls from the women. The only difference is that if you can conquer this ultimate challenge you won’t be left standing alone on an island…you’ll have company.
It is all too easy to succumb to the school girl comfort of a crush. It doesn’t matter how old you are; when those butterflies hit it brings you back to second grade when you were getting your pigtails pulled on the playground. So why not just enjoy it? A crush is basically a 1-2-Punch to your self-esteem and intellect. If you actually want to have a shot with this guy, appearing vapid and insecure will not work in your favor.
You may need to check yourself if:
- Every time you open your mouth to say something intelligent you end up giggling and playing with your hair instead.
- Your usage of the word ‘yes’ increases by more than 40% (ex: Yes! I love making my own granola bars too! Yes! I would love to drive you to and from the airport! Yes! I agree- cats are the best! Please ignore my dog…)
- You are making yourself too available: When he walks into Starbucks at 7:05 to get his morning brew you are already there, holding the door. When he says he might be going to one of two bars you blow your paycheck on a hot new outfit and head out to both.
- You look at him like you look at him like he is a sack full of abandoned kittens
- You lose control over your face: your cheeks blush, your eyes bat, your pupils dilate, and you grin like the contestant on the Price is Right that just won a new set of cookware by adding a dollar to her competitor’s guess.
- When he gives you a compliment you sound like Miss America giving her acceptance speech: “Thank you!! I honestly had no idea! I can’t believe you like me! You REALLY like me!”
So what’s the problem with this? It makes you BORING. You might as well be a bobble head doll; perpetually smiling and nodding yes. Once you start trying to please you stop being your own person and you lose your appeal. So what’s the cure for a crush? Do exactly the opposite: super-charge yourself. Instead of diluting who you are to become what you think someone else wants, invest energy into being yourself. Focus on doing the things you love and make your life even more awesome than it already is. Do things that you’re passionate about and that excite you. The most attractive woman is a woman that is happy and complete in and of herself. If you have a fun life that you love, a man will want to work to be a part of it (no giggling required).